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Mama K
Ok, got the camera ready? *taps mic* This thing good to go?
Rufus
*behind camera* We're on already.
Mama K
Oh crap - Hello, everyone!
Mama K
I bet you're wondering what this is all about - who we are, what's the point, etc. etc. etc.
The King
Etcetera!
Mama K
Did I invite you to this broadcast?
The King
I need no inv-
Mama K
NO I DID NOT. Now scram.
Mama K
Anyway. A long time ago, we girls were inspired to create our own fictional land of delights a la The Road to Fooksburgh and what not. We had our enclosure, we had our men, and we had our craziness all locked in together with no escape.

Mama K
Or so we thought.
Mama K
Here's the thing - if you've heard of us, then you're probably wondering where we've been this whole time.
Mama K
Well, people went away to school, our time became monopolized by classes...
Mama K
And sensing this weakness, Jareth led an uprising.
Mama K
His kung-fu was much stronger than ours.
Mama K
So off he went, whisking Tenoko away with him and leaving the gates open for anyone to leave.
Rufus
Well, not just anyone. Steven Dorff is still locked in Satan's closet.
Mama K
You know, I really need to ask her who built the lock on that thing.
Rufus
And then there's the whole thing with the young clones and the dead people. They can't leave either.
Mama K
Right - it's like the whole Indiana Jones thing, they can't cross the seal. If they do, then the whole space/time continuum implodes.
Mama K
Now I don't know about you, but I like the space/time continuum. It kinda allows for my existence.
Mama K
But people did stay of their own free will! U2 stayed because we have Edge's lab here, and that recording studio he built in his spare time...Gerry-
Rufus
Actually, he's the Phantom again.
Mama K
Ok, The Phantom stayed because his lair is underneath us, and is actually now Zoo property.. and I have no idea what Paul and Ringo's reasons are for staying. They say anything to you, Rufus?

Rufus
Macca's staying because he wants to stay young and pretty. And we are the best people qualified to deal with his shrinking.
Mama K
Makes sense. And Ringo?
Rufus
Pressured into it by the other three.
Mama K
Figures. Eddie left as well, but he'll come back. We only let him go to make The Riches.
Rufus
*makes a wrapping up motion*
Mama K
Ok! So because of this uprising, we've decided to make the Zoo its own seperate nation rather than just our Internet harem. People are free to leave if they wish, and in having a choice most of them actually opt to stay.
Mama K
We also now have our own international police force! Show them the boys, Rufus.
The Boys
Detective Ray Kowalski
Constable Benton Fraser
Sergeant Nicholas Angel
Mama K
Welcome to the Zoo, v. 2.0.
Rufus
...I feel a general sense of dread.

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The Zoo (v. 2.0)

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